msem-instigator

Protection from noncreatures and from creatures with power 3 or less
Players dealt damage by Absurdity also get that many poison counters. (A player with ten or more poison counters loses the game.)
When Absurdity is put into a graveyard from anywhere, shuffle it into its owner's library.

Ancient Cairns enters tapped.
As Ancient Cairns enters, choose a color other than red.
{T}: Add {R} or one mana of the chosen color.

Counter target spell unless its controller pays {2}.

When Aether Sculptor enters, create a tapped colorless artifact token named Lotus Petal with “{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.”

When Library Infiltrator enters, target creature can't be blocked by creatures with lesser power this turn.
Whenever one or more creatures you control deal combat damage to a player or planeswalker, draw a card.

You may have Flawless Counterfeit enter as a copy of any noncreature artifact on the battlefield.

When Relearn History enters, draw two cards.
You have no maximum hand size.

Wandering Megaflora has hexproof as long as it's untapped.
Whenever Wandering Megaflora attacks, untap another target creature you control.

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +3/+0 and has menace.
Whenever enchanted creature deals combat damage to a player, discard a card, then draw a card.

Exile target creature or planeswalker, then exile its controller's graveyard.

Flash
Haste
{3}, {T}: Exchange control of two target noncreature spells. Their controllers may choose new targets for the spells.

Destroy target land an opponent controls. Its controller may search their library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.
Draw a card.

Creature spells you cast cost {1} less to cast for each of their creature types that no creature you control has.
Whenever you cast a creature spell, if it has a creature type no creature you control has, draw a card.

When Mindbreak Artisan enters, you may search your library for an artifact card, reveal it, shuffle, then put that card on top.
Other artifacts you control have “You may choose not to untap this artifact during your untap step” and “{3}{U}{U}, {T}: Gain control of target creature for as long as you control this artifact and it remains tapped.”

When Fellor Ironborn enters, you may return target artifact card from your graveyard to the battlefield. If it's an Equipment, you may attach it to target creature you control.

This spell costs {1} less to cast for each card put into your graveyard from anywhere this turn.
Target creature gets -4/-4 until end of turn.

{2}{G}: Exile up to three cards from graveyards. Autocrat X, where X is the number of cards exiled this way. (If you don't control an autocrat, put X +1/+1 counters on this. It becomes an autocrat until it has no +1/+1 counters on it.)
Whenever Hegemony Monarch attacks, you may exile target card from a graveyard. If you do, untap it and it gains trample until end of turn.

This spell can't be countered.
Trample
Whenever Lumbering Thoctar becomes the target of a spell or ability, counter it. Then put a stun counter on Lumbering Thoctar.
Whenever Lumbering Thoctar becomes untapped, draw a card.

When Voldaren Crypt-Guard enters, create a Weapon token. (It's an Equipment artifact with “Equipped creature gets +1/+1” and equip {2}.)

Flying

Lifelink
If you would gain life, you gain that much life plus 1 instead.

When Pilgrim of Many Provinces enters, draw a card. Then you may discard a creature card. If you do, draw a card.

Whenever Ensouled Thief attacks, upgrade it. (Give it one of the listed counters it doesn't already have.)
• +1/+1
• Prowess

Whenever a creature you control with toughness 4 or greater attacks, it gains deathtouch until end of turn.
Whenever a creature you control deals combat damage to a player, you may pay 1 life. If you do, draw a card.

Trample
Experience (Whenever this creature attacks, if it has fewer than three +1/+1 counters on it, put a +1/+1 counter on it.)