msem-instigator

Target creature gains indestructible until end of turn. You gain 4 life.
Prophecy {G} (Once each turn, you may exile a card with prophecy as you reveal it. When you do, you may cast it for its prophecy cost as long as it's exiled.)

Cast this spell only before combat.
At end of combat this turn, return all creatures that attacked or blocked this combat to their owners' hands. If no creatures attacked or blocked this combat, draw two cards.

When Prod the Stitchwork enters, it deals 1 damage to target player. That player sacrifices a creature.
At the beginning of your end step, if an opponent was dealt damage by three or more sources this turn, exile the top card of your library. You may play it until the end of your next turn.

Prowess
Whenever Prodigal Spark is dealt damage, it deals that much damage to any target.

Choose two or four —
• Search your library for a Demon card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. You lose life equal to its mana value.
• Sacrifice a creature. If you do, draw two cards.
• Each opponent loses 2 life and you gain 2 life.
• Conjure a card named Fatigue and put it on top of your library. (It's a colorless sorcery that costs {2} with “Draw a card.”)

Profane Flames deals 4 damage to target creature or planeswalker.
Create an Idol token. (It's an artifact with “{1}, Sacrifice this artifact: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature. Activate only as a sorcery.”)

Flying, lifelink
Pay 5 life: Put target permanent card in a graveyard onto the battlefield under your control.

When Profaner of Souls enters, you may return target creature card with mana value 2 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Revive {6}{B} ({6}{B}, Exile this card from your graveyard: Create a token that's a copy of it except it has no mana cost. Revive only as a sorcery.)

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may exile a card from your hand with a knowledge counter on it. If you do, draw a card. Then you may have Professor Adelia become a copy of any permanent card you own in exile with a knowledge counter on it, except it has this ability.

If Professor Haldean would leave the battlefield, exile him instead.
Whenever you cast a spell, you may untap Professor Haldean and another target permanent.
{T}: Professor Haldean deals 1 damage to each opponent.

{1}, {T}: Copy target activated or triggered ability you control. You may choose new targets for the copy.
{3}{U}, {T}: Copy target spell you control. You may choose new targets for the copy. (A copy of a permanent spell becomes a token.)

Whenever another nontoken creature you control enters, if it has a different name than each other creature you control and card in your graveyard, you may create a token that's a copy of it.

Whenever Professor's Assistant becomes tapped, add {R}. Until end of turn, you don't lose this mana as steps and phases end.

Equipped creature gets +0/+3.
Whenever equipped creature dies, draw a card.
Equip {3}

Flying
Whenever you scry, create a 1/1 blue Chimera creature token with flying. This ability triggers only once each turn.

Erratic (When this creature dies, reveal the top four cards of your library. Put a creature card that costs less than this revealed this way onto the battlefield and the rest on the bottom of your library in any order.)
Morph {1}{G} (You may cast this card face down as a 2/2 creature for {3}. Turn it face up any time for its morph cost.)

Kicker {2} (You may pay an additional {2} as you cast this spell.)
Counter target spell if its mana value is 2 or less. If this spell was kicked, counter that spell if its mana value is 4 or less instead.

When Project Head enters, investigate. (Create a colorless Clue artifact token with “{2}, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.”)
{2}{U}, Exile Project Head: Shuffle your hand and graveyard into your library, then draw seven cards. Activate only if you control seven or more artifacts.

As long as another creature you control is attacking, Prolific Thief can't be blocked.
Whenever Prolific Thief deals combat damage to a player, draw a card, then discard a card.

Search your library for a basic land card and a Desert card, put them onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Distorted (This creature can be blocked by tapped creatures but not untapped creatures.)

Search your library for a nonland card, reveal it, and put it into your hand, then shuffle. Until the end of your next turn, spells you cast with the same name as that card cost {3} less to cast.

Once each turn, when an Aura is attached to Prop Custodian or you cast a spell that targets it, you may audition for white. (Create a 1/1 Construct Actor creature token, a Scout Role giving 2/3 and vigilance, or a Cleric Role giving 2/2 and lifelink. Roles replace older ones.)

Whenever a nontoken creature dies, you may exile that card from its owner's graveyard. If you do, return each other card exiled with Prop Recycling to its owner's graveyard.
At the beginning of combat on your turn, create a token that's a copy of a card exiled with Prop Recycling.

Enchant creature
Whenever enchanted creature attacks, audition for green. (Create a 1/1 Construct Actor creature token, a Scout Role giving 2/3 and vigilance, or a Warrior Role giving 3/2 and trample. Roles replace older ones.)